I have come to learn only God can make my paths straight. These past few weeks have brought with it a complete writers block. Normally I read the words and reflections and can just drop line after line. Yet lately I find myself struggling to come up w even one cohesive thought. I'm not sure why I am having this issue but I trust the Lord God is leading and building me for something better. I will lean not on my own understanding. His purposes and ways are higher and more sovereign than mine will ever be. That is what his word says, so therefore, I will believe it even if I feel totally inadequate.
So many doubts creep in my head like..."who am I to think I can motivate others"? "Why would they care what I have to say? My writing makes no sense, and has too many typos." "They probably think I am a complete idiot". "What's the point, these messages are probably not being read by anyone anyway." I start questioning my God given directive. If I continue on with that way of thinking, before too long, I lose focus, direction, and hope. I could easily become discouraged and quit all together
Gratefully I recognize when these thoughts come to me, they are not from God. I am being attacked by the enemy, the devil, the evil one, Satan, whatever moniker you want to call him. He is threatened by my obedience to God but he only has one play in his play book. He wants to plague me with lies, in the hope I will succumb to his deception. BUT not today Satan…Not today. Your lies are not welcome in my ear. I flick you with the mighty word of God and with the reminder that you have already lost the war. Get thee behind me with your lies and evil ways.
My messages of encouragement are doing great work for God's kingdom. I know this because I am told daily by those that read them how important they are to them. As well as, how often the enemy tries to attack me. God has graced me with the ability to motivate and encourage. He has equipped me with the energy and desire to reach out to others. With the help of the Holy Spirit, he uses my obedience to help and boost others. I must persevere. I must press on. I must believe and trust God's purpose over my own insecurities and puny thinking.
As a frail human self-doubt and insecurities are common. I'm grateful I have a God that loves and speaks to me through his word. He tells me to persevere and to keep on trucking. Keep doing his work even if it's hard or doesn't make sense. So I will do as he instructs. I will post my messages, ignoring how they or I will be received. I will focus on being obedient to him even when I feel inadequate and uncomfortable with what he asks me to do. Despite my insecurities I will persist in prayer. I pray God fixes my writers block. I also pray my daily messages reach the ears they are supposed to, as well as, recharges and renews those that read them. May joy, peace, and love be yours with God's amazing graces.
Keep on trucking.
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